“What you’re supposed to do when you don’t like a thing is change it. If you can’t change it, change the way you think about it. Don’t complain.”
You can control most of the things people complain about.
Never do I get more internally frustrated, than when people complain about their job, money woes, debts, lack of excitement, lack of freedom, their car, sports commitments, friends etc. Not because they are small issues, but because they can all be changed. Not only can they be changed, but they originated from a decision that was made at some point. A decision that no body forced onto them, but one that was voluntarily executed. Having things to complain about makes no logical sense to me. Sure, they are always things that happen beyond our control, but they are exactly that, OUT OF OUR CONTROL. Therefore complaining about them is even worse. Those things should be accepted as there is literally nothing that could have been done to change it. But I will leave that alone for now. Everything in our immediate control, such as the things listed above, should never be subjected to complaining. However it seems very popular in modern culture to complain about our “misfortunes”. Complaining effectively changes nothing, and is basically like yelling, “I HAVE NO POWER OR CONTROL OF MY OWN LIFE.” Not very empowering.
I believe that people lack ownership of their own life. It is easier to blame circumstances than to blame their own poor decision making. It is harder to take total accountability and acceptance of everything that happens in ones life. But the truth is, that our lives turn out exactly the way we have chosen them.
One thing I learnt during my life overhaul a few years ago, is that I have complete freedom and control over how my life turns out. For things that are out of my control, I can still choose how I react and accept those things. I take complete ownership of my decisions and feelings toward all of life. When I am in a rut, I can still accept that I put myself there, and therefore I can get myself out. When you take complete ownership and decide to be accountable to everything, you no longer need to complain. Because really, complaining is all about how something outside of you (external) made you feel x, or made you do x. It basically takes away your freedom to choose. And for me, I like to choose everything that happens in my life. I am the creator. Being accountable is one of the greatest blessings, because every decision is made on purpose, and is made in liaison with an (internal) compass that guides every thought and action towards a life of freedom. So not only do I avoid complaining like the plague, I do my best to reduce my exposure to people who do complain.
Since I have taken complete ownership and accountability in my life, I have been much more inclined to TAKING ACTION. I am no longer passive when I don’t like how something is happening in my life. I am much more attentive and can more easily see the daily lessons life has to offer us all. I have found this especially true when things are going badly! When you can take ownership of a terrible situation, you are also blessed with a great opportunity to learn. This also reduces the likelihood of these things recurring. In fact, once you decide to be accountable for your life, learning becomes a massive obsession. At least in my experience, I have grown to be a voracious learner in so many areas. Because the more I learn, the more power I have to TAKE ACTION and choose things that will aid in creating my chosen blueprint for life. And to me that is a very enticing proposition.
So there you have it. I complained about complaining! 🙂 This is really just what I have learned about being accountable, and the negative impacts of refusing to accept this powerful tool.
I really hope we all aim to complain less, and act more. We might find more interesting things to talk about, and maybe increase our gratitude in the process.